*an ongoing section dedicated to the unrealistic women pop culture loves to pour on us. Guess what? I’m sick of it and so is every other real guy. The guys who drool over the hotties in Playboy and Maxim are delusional…or they never get laid.
So in honor of all you real women out there who get no love because pop culture seems to have a fantasy love relationship with size zero models, a list…
SICKLY SKINNY MODELS AKA MODELS WHO WEAR SIZES O-4
Wanna be a super model? Ok, then get skinny. REAL skinny. Having problems? Don’t eat. Feel those skin and bones still make you look fat? Become an anorexic. Sure, some models may not be size zeroes but ALL super models are fake and completely unrealistic for just about every man. To you guys obsessed with models, get a life and stop thinking you can pull your dream girl one day. You know why? Because you can’t and shouldn’t even want to. They’re fake. And they don’t eat so how can you even go to dinner with a super model?
SKINNY ACTRESSES – TOO SKINNY!
IN ORDER:Keira Knightley, Kate Hudson, Sienna Miller and Mary-Kate Olsen are your typical actresses these days, their heads pushed on top of a skeleton ripe for the cameras. Some dudes are in LOVE with these women but those dudes are also the same guys who think comic book and video game girls are hot too. Yes, otherwise known as losers. Lame ass losers.
THE BULLSHIT SKINNY ADS
Look at these three broads up above. I feel like if the wind blows a little too much their tiny little figures will be swept away. You know what happens when real women see these chicks in ads for their favorite products? Their self-esteem drops. A LOT. You know what happens when most guys see chicks like this in ads? They have dreams of sleeping with them because they never will and probably don’t even know what a REAL WOMEN looks like. Hint: you usually can’t see every bone on a real girl’s body. Real women also don’t look emaciated.
THE REAL WOMEN
IN ORDER: Beyonce, Rosario Dawson & Rose McGowan, Scarlett Johansson, Salma Hayek, Toccara Jones are all GREAT examples of curvier, more voluptuous REAL WOMEN. Sure they’re still smoking hot and have nice bodies but we’re much closer to the realm of normalcy with these beautiful women then we were with those female skeletons mentioned above. What’s greater is the fact that Toccara Jones is a plus size model and yes, those headlights ARE real. In fact, all of the beautiful ladies above don’t do silicon which is an ode to the greatest sex appeal women have to give men: natural beauty.
