Well, this one was a little difficult to do since it took a little time rummaging through the past to find some things we all liked. The first one was especially hard since it’s completely politically incorrect but that makes it even more fun. Besides, P.C. or not P.C., does anyone really give a shit? If you’re at this site, you probably don’t.
PEE WEE HERMAN
Sometimes we just have to forget that he went into an adult movie theater in Sarasota, Florida and felt the need to jerk off in public. Hey, a lot of guys get that urge to choke the chicken but most of them have the ability to realize it’s probably a better idea to stroke it at home, in private, where no one else is watching. However, Pee Wee was a little different in a lot of ways and I guess masturbation was one of them as well. But let’s forget all the self-pleasure tactics Pee Wee used. Let’s remember all the good things he gave us. Remember, Pee Wee Herman was one of the most loved and entertaining children’s characters during the time and you couldn’t flip through the television channels without catching a glimpse of Pee Wee having a blast with his weirdo friends in the Playhouse. Also, Pee Wee’s laugh is absolutely classic, a laugh NO ONE will ever be able to duplicate again. Another thing, after the whole negative public masturbation thingy, Paul Reubens (actor who plays Pee Wee Herman) appeared on that year’s MTV Music Awards as Pee Wee and looked at the audience and said, “Heard any good jokes lately?” That shows some serious balls. We HAVE to bring back Pee Wee. Sign the petition at your local grocery store: BRING BACK PEE WEE
PINK PANTHER (CARTOON)
When I hear The Pink Panther, the furthest thing from my mind is that stupid movie, especially the new ones starring Steve Martin. The original movies were much better, much funnier, and had much more substance. However, as I mentioned before, I really don’t care about the movies. No, I’m a Pink Panther nut and I’m referring to the actual Pink Panther, the cartoon character. How a panther that is pink can be so pimp is beyond me. If you get a moment, download or find a way to check out an episode of the Pink Panther cartoon. First of all, you can’t beat that theme song composed by Henry Mancini. Second, you can’t beat the Pink Panther’s walk which is two steps to the left and two steps to right, not one and one like the rest of us. And notice how the Pink Panther always seems to be cool, calm and collected. I look at him and the only thing playing in my mind is Jay Z singing, “We doin’, big pimpin’, spendin’ cheese.”
ARCADES
Used to be there were at least 4-5 video game arcades in each part of town, kids and teenagers having wars over which ones were better. You had your gigantic arcades that could fit hundreds and even over a thousand kids and you also had your cozy, mom and pop arcades up the street where the local neighborhood boys would find themselves everyday after school and all throughout the weekends. Believe it or not, these arcades were a safe haven for boys (and girls too) who weren’t big on sports, liked girls but couldn’t get one, and only had a friend or two that also liked video games. Mostly, it was for a normal boy who wanted to play some games and have a little fun when there was nothing else to do. Arcades were perfect for this. Also, every arcade usually had the owner or manager on site supervising everything just in case the boys in the place started acting squirrelly. I really can’t figure out what happened to all the video game arcades but I’m thinking personal video game consoles blew them way out of the water and kids stopped wanting to leave the house. It’s also the reason kids are overweight and lazy these days. Just getting off your ass to walk up the street to an arcade was ten times more exercise then kids are doing in 2009. BRING BACK THE ARCADES!
