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MONEY HONEYS AND PLAYBOY BUNNIES

Sunday, May 17th, 2009

This time around, I’m going with some of the up and coming stars in today’s world. Well, at least the one’s I thought I could manipulate into this column somehow due to my wildly ridiculous mind. But, I got some hot new names that are all over the place these days.

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$$$MONEY$$$ - ZOE SALDANA

I have to put her here now that I’ve seen the newest Star Trek. Saw the flick yesterday and looooooved it. And, I can’t stand Star Trek! Never have, never will…unless, we’re talking about this new one. And, if we’re talking about the new Star Trek, it’s hard not to talk about Zoe Saldana, the actress playing the new Nyota Uhura. There is cute, there is hot, and then there is smoooooooooking hot! I wonder which category Ms. Saldana falls into. She’s Dominican, a New Jersey native and a good little actress as well. Not only is she gorgeous but she can live up to whatever role she’s playing. This, I dig. As in, I really dig this smoking hot and gorgeous chick named Zoe Saldana who is now officially my new crush. Stop Pop Culture is now officially following you and also officially one of your biggest fans. GO ZOE!

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PORN HONEY – SASHA GREY

A Northern California girl, Sasha Grey is one of the most famous porn stars right now, straight out of Sacramento of all places. Saved up $7K to move to the lovely City of Angels to pursue acting and wound up becoming a porn queen instead. She’s apparently big on aggressive sex such as degrading sex acts like being slapped and hit during intercourse. Such a lovely girl, ain’t she? She’s also been featured in the Roots video, “Birthday Girl”, as well as Smashing Pumpkins music video “Superchrist”. Recently, she’s been testing her mettle in the acting world, appearing in some low budget films. In a Rolling Stone interview, she was quoted as saying to the women in the world “it’s okay to be a slut”. Sasha, how about you have your opinions and the rest of the women in the world have theirs? Celebrities say some silly things but this porn star saying something that ludicrous is just dumb as shit. Also, one other thing, it was really hard finding any good pictures of Ms. Grey where she wasn’t blowing some dude or taking it up the you know what. How many women would admire that about themselves? I’m curious.

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PLAYBOY BUNNY – DASHA ASTAFIEVA

Dasha Astafieva, January 2009 Playmate of the Month, making the Playboy’s 55th Anniversary Playmate. This Ukrainian beauty is also part of the Ukrainian pop group, Nikita, showing that not only can she rock a hot body, she can rock a tune also. At least, that’s probably what she thinks. Me? I can’t see any Playmate of the Month rocking any kind of music unless it’s gorgeous Vanessa Williams who had a hell of a successful music career after she was stripped of her Miss America crown. Then again, that was Miss America, not a Playboy Playmate. Anyways, I guess you might start hearing more and more about her throughout this year since she’s apparently cutting in on The Girls Next Door‘s action and trying to win over Hugh Hefner. This is not sitting well with platinum blonde doll, Holly Madison. Yes, my anti-pop culture friends, you shall be hearing much more of this pathetic tale in the coming months.

AND THE WINNER IS…Sasha Grey is immediately out of the running in this battle due to that ignorant comment. Look, I understand you’re a super successful porn star and yeah, most of us watch porn however, telling young women out there that it’s “okay to be a slut” is just pathetic. So it comes down to Zoe Saldana and Hugh Hefner’s possible new squeeze, Dasha Astafieva. Is this really even a contest? Not in my eyes. Besides, Dasha is overrated to me. She’s not even one of the prettier Playmates I’ve seen. Zoe, on the other hand, is drop dead gorgeous and looks pretty classy too. She wins in looks and style! 

ZOE SALDANA WINS!

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*I will be going to the next Star Trek partly because of you, Zoe

THE TIP TOP OF HIP HOP

Monday, May 4th, 2009

I’ve made a list, in no particular order, of some of the greatest hip hop albums of all time, stop pop culture style. Most of these albums dropped before hip hop had even become “pop culture”. Please, feel free to lend more as these aren’t the be all, end all.

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Nas – Illmatic

Some consider this to be the greatest hip hop album of all time although I tend to disagree, albeit due to personal reasons, not facts. However, this classic lesson in true hip hop can’t be disputed as one of the best since damn near every track hits hard and Nas’s lyrical flow is hard to stop listening to.

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Del the Funkee Homosapien – I Wish My Brother George Was Here

This is one of those Pulp Fiction albums of greatness: it’s not great fundamentally but incredibly innovative and difference, hence, making it incredible. This was Del’s introduction to hip hop fans and there were no questions asked afterwards knowing now that Del was an incredibly gifted rapper as well as one of strangest son of a bitches hip hop will ever know.

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Nia – Blackalicious

Any true hip hop head will tell you it’d be hard to find a better rapper than Gift of Gab from Blackalicious. There really isn’t anything he can’t do on the mic. If you really want proof of this, Nia is the album for you. And, if you have a chance, download or buy the single “Swan Lake” that Gift of Gab did with DJ Shadow around the same time, one of the greatest hip hop songs of all time. ‘Nuff said.

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Freestyle Fellowship – Innercity Griots

Quite possibly the album that put underground hip hop on the map forever, Fellowship’s Innercity Griots is a classic to anyone who knows about hip hop on the west coast. You mentioned Fellowship (nobody bothers with the word Freestyle anymore) on the left coast and you’re bound to run into some smiles. Aceyalone and Mikah 9 lead the way of the lyrically gifted Los Angeles hip hop ensemble definitely worthy of a listen and a buy.

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Notorious B.I.G. – Ready to Die

Here’s something interesting: I’m a west coast guy however, you will not see any Tupac albums on this list. Why? None were quite good enough. 2Pac had some classic, great songs, but not any true classic albums. At least not in my book. From first song to last song, Ready to Die is incredible. What’s funny is the big hits from Biggie’s first album (Juicy, Big Papa, One More Chance) aren’t even the best song. The title track, Ready to Die, is incredible. Listen to it. Then, listen to it again and again and again until you realize how damn good it is.

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The Roots – Do You Want More?!!!??!

Ah, the Roots, possibly the most gifted hip hop ensemble all around since they make all of their music with instruments and have a great rapper to boot. When this album dropped, it blew everybody in the world of hip hop away. The songs were jazzy but hit hard and still remained mellow and melodious. What’s great about the Roots is they have a unique sound that’s impossible to mimic and their first album is a very indicative of this.

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Tribe Called Quest -Midnight Marauders

Yes, you may think I’m a whack job with this choice since so many hip hop fans would pick Tribe’s first or second album as their best however, their third installment was a complete sleeper and therefore makes this list on that little fact alone. Tribe fans tend to get caught up in their Bonita Apple Bum and Scenario days, both classic hip hop tracks. The final cut on this album, God Lives Through, is one for the ages, and an incredibly fun song to listen to if you’re a hip hop fan that goes way back. To hear Tribe name some of their hip hop brethren in this song always gives me the goose bumps.

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New Jersey Drive Soundtrack Vol. 1 & 2

I don’t think any of our newer hip hop heads have ever heard of New Jersey Drive or its classic soundtrack, an album that was far better than the movie it was made for. There’s so many hidden gems on these two volumes that it’s hard to pick which ones stand out but “You Won’t Go Far” by O.C. and Organized Konfusion is one of the better tracks. But this purely east coast lineup is damn hard to beat just to name a few of them: Organized Konfusion, O.C., Black Moon, Outkast, Redman and Notrious B.I.G. Buy this album and show it off to all your homies that have never heard of it.

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DJ Shadow – Entroducing

Quite possibly the greatest musical hip hop achievement of all time, DJ Shadow’s first album, Entroducing, is one of the most amazing gifts to your ear you will ever receive. Listen as he takes you on the most incredible journey through the sounds of hip hop that you will ever take in your life. This man is so damn gifted and this album so great that it doesn’t even need rapping in it. It should be every rapper’s dream to make a song with DJ Shadow at the helm because his beats are perfectly constructed without even a minor blemish. If you haven’t heard this album, GET IT!!! All you need to do is shut your pie hole and listen to hip hop music at its finest.